“You must love yourself before you can love another” isn’t just another cheesy cliche; it’s truth.
It’s been raining a lot lately here in Los Angeles. I know folks in other parts of the country and world have been experiencing far more extreme weather, but this rain is our only winter weather. And I love it.
Now I believe we all have this greatness within. Not the exact same kind of greatness, but some sort of greatness. Maybe not always a greatness that’ll give you celebrity status and make you millions, but you’ve got something.
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about thinking. Which might not be the best idea since thinking can get us into a lot of trouble.
I just can’t help it. I work a lot with thoughts. That’s a major part of being a therapist (Besides the emotions, which I know y’all can’t get enough of.). “Tell me what you think about that,” “Are there any other ways to look at that,” “How can you reframe that?” The more I work with thoughts (Mine and those shared with me.), the more I question our relationship with them.
It can be easy to forget how good we have it and think that something else might be better. I totally remember being a kid and thinking, I cannot wait to be a grownup. Probably so I could eat ice cream for breakfast.
One thing I noticed in particular as I looked at these movements (whether big or small) is that the struggle between fear and courage is always at the forefront. As I made my way to present day, I reflected on how badly some people want a wall between the United States and Mexico. While I won’t pretend to know the first thing about border security, I do know that if we’re putting up walls, figuratively or for real, it’s because we’re afraid.
I love the rain! I definitely didn’t appreciate it as much as I should have when I lived somewhere with a lot of weather, but I sure do love it now. I love the change it brings. I love that it cleanses the smog.
The amount of information and options out there these days, and access to it, is astronomical. There’s actually a term for this now “choice overload.” Access to too many choices can lead to anxiety and depression.
At one point in my life, when I was much less mindful, I googled the phrase “how to let go.” It was a lifetime ago, so I don’t remember what I was struggling to let go, but if I was asking google, I must have been struggling.
The google search didn’t turn up much that was useful.
That’s because, as I learned in the years since, there isn’t a set algorithm to letting go.
It’s that time of year again! To set massively large, unattainable goals that leave you to spend the rest of the year feeling like a total loser when you don’t reach them.
Ah yes, the intoxicating, yet elusive new year’s resolution.
Oprah gets a favorites list every year. So why shouldn’t I? I’ll apologize in advance to those occupying my favorites list for not having as much sway as Oprah, but we all gotta start somewhere.
I’m not particularly religious, although, I can get behind many of the morals represented in most religions (Big fan of that peace and love!). So I’m much more a secular celebrator of all holidays. Celebrations are my jam!
I’m currently in a time-out. But to write this article about time-outs, I’m going to have to take a time-out from my time-out. Then, I’m going back to my time-out.
Is that “Who’s on first” enough for ya?
I know Thanksgiving is over (and that it can be a controversial holiday), but I’m still thinking about gratitude (Also, please excuse the cheesy title. My inner Dr. Suess loves rhyming.).
Gratitude isn’t something I only think about during the giving of thanks. It’s often on my mind because I know it’s a good thing.
Awhile ago I wrote an article “How I Deal With People Who Suck.” At the same time I started an article entitled “How I Deal With the Suck.” When I say started, I mean that phrase is all I wrote. I thought after the last week and a half in my part of the world, it might be a good time to write the rest of it.
I can’t remember the last time I was bored. If ever. I’ve always been quite good at entertaining myself and there’s always more I want to do than I can ever find time for. This is awesome because I’m never bored. Life is perpetually a grand adventure (Not all of it entirely desired but adventure nonetheless.) as I’m always learning and exploring.
But this can also come with the dark side of being too busy. Being too busy leads to feeling overwhelmed, anxious, sad, and angry. There’s also this weird side effect of not actually getting much done. Even though we’re “so busy.”
Here’s a special Tuesday mindfulness edition in honor of the midterm elections. Also, I didn’t have time to write a blog post on Monday so that may have also played a role in this.
As I prepared to vote, I thought about how important it is to make mindful decisions. And how difficult that can be. Many people only listen to their emotions when making decisions or refuse to pay attention to information that doesn’t fit their beliefs. Many also don’t do the research to see if the “facts” actually have any evidence to support them.
I've always been a people person. I grew up in a large family with a bunch of noise and activity. I make friends easily. I like to be out and about trying new things, going to new places, and chatting up strangers.
So imagine my surprise when (not too long ago) I discovered that I'm actually an introvert.
Running your own business can be hard. Working for someone else can be hard. Not working at all can be hard. Being in a relationship can be hard. Raising a family can be hard. Being alone can be hard. Training for a competition can be hard. Learning a new skill can be hard. Having an illness or injury can be hard. Freaking filling out a form can be hard.
Life can be hard.
Since Halloween is sneaking up quickly, let’s discuss something really scary today. Meditation.
I say scary because often when I utter the word “meditation,” eyes grow large and there’s an audible gasp, followed by some of those nervous giggles. “I can’t sit still.” “That makes my anxiety worse.” “The silence would drive me crazy.” “I’ll never be able to do that.” Some don’t say anything and simply stare at me like I’ve grown a second head.
Meditation can be super intimidating. And seem like something only for hippies or more enlightened beings. There are so many preconceived ideas that many are unwilling to even give it a bit of a try.