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On Service to Others

MLK Day of Service

By Amanda Stemen, MS, LCSW

Every single year, the third Monday in January is a day to honor Martin Luther King, Jr. and his legacy. Most often, I hear people talk about how excited they are to have this day off work or school. While you can’t hate on that, the day is actually the only federal holiday designated as a national day of service. This means that the MLK Day of Service is intended to be a "day on, not a day off." According to the Corporation for National & Community Service, the day is meant to “empower individuals, strengthen communities, bridge barriers, create solutions to social problems, and move us closer to Dr. King's vision of a ‘Beloved Community.’”

This I love. It’s truly the best way to honor the work that Dr. King did throughout his life. My first taste of this day of service was working to organize Hands On Atlanta’s MLK Day of Service. The energy and enthusiasm of everyone involved in one of the country’s largest service projects has inspired me ever since. What can be accomplished together is truly amazing!

This concept of a day of service got me thinking about service beyond this one day, though. While there are many opportunities to serve on this day in particular, and I highly recommend it, I don’t think giving back should be limited to just one day a year. Service to others isn’t simply a way to honor one man. It’s a way to honor everyone who’s dedicated their lives to serving. 

Also, in a time when loneliness seems to be a cultural epidemic, serving others can also be service to ourselves. There are many ways we can share our talents, skills, time, and resources to benefit and connect more deeply with ourselves, others, and the world around us. And being mindful of how we do it can have an even more powerful effect. 

Habitat for Humanity volunteers having fun!

Have Some Fun

Serving others should be enjoyable for all involved. Joy is what creates change and connection. Giving your time doing something you detest while complaining about it might physically get some work done, but it doesn’t actually do as much as you might think it would.

So what do you enjoy? What are you good at? What would you do for free or without receiving praise? Because serving others is done without an expectation of receiving anything in return. 

If you enjoy being outdoors and physical movement, you could clean up trash or clear trails, help build a house, run in a charity race, coach with the Special Olympics or other amateur sports team, or assist at an animal rescue. 

If you’re artistic, you could help paint a mural, teach kids (or adults) how to make crafts, donate extra supplies to an after school program, or design flyers. 

If you’re musical, you could hold a concert to raise money for a cause, play at a senior citizen home, or just set up shop out in the community somewhere. Who doesn’t love a bit of unexpected music when they’re out and about.

If you enjoy organizing you could start and run a volunteer opportunity or event. If you enjoy politics, local, state, and federal campaigns always enjoy the extra help. There is something for every possible interest. Just get to Googling if you don’t believe me.

Fit It Into Your Lifestyle

We’re more likely to do things when they’re easy for us to do. Service to others should feel natural and an extension of ourselves and our lives. Otherwise we won’t participate as much. 

If there are opportunities to give back through organizations you’re already involved in do that. Religious organizations always have volunteer opportunities. Many places of employment offer opportunities to give back. Schools are always looking for extra sets of hands. 

Stay local. Most communities have programs that need volunteers, city councils, neighborhood watches, community centers, places and activities that are right down the street so all you have to do is open your door and take a few steps. Or find something that’s near where you work or on your route home. 

Or make it super duper easy. Smile at strangers (and your loved ones). Pay someone’s toll fees. Let a car into your lane. Send cards. Open and hold doors. Ask how someone’s day is and mindfully listen. Give compliments. All of that and more is service to others without having to put in a whole lot of effort. I can’t tell you how much a friendly smile or compliment has made my entire day.

Making friends while helping others out.

Make Some Friends

Whether you are happy with your social connections or not, volunteering with others is the perfect opportunity to more deeply connect with others.

If you already have close relationships, volunteering with your partner, family, and/or friends can only deepen those relationships. Shared activities are team building, help us learn more about one another, cultivate social skills, and create memories that will last a lifetime. The positive emotions of giving back will also create a deeper emotional bond. 

And if you’re feeling lonely and have had difficulty meeting people or creating meaningful relationships, volunteering brings people with similar interests and values together to accomplish a goal. Working together to complete a task helps form a bond. Particularly, if you’re working on a longer term project you’ll have natural, built in opportunities to connect with the same people over and over again, which is how relationships are formed. 

Serving others doesn’t mean sacrificing yourself. In fact, sacrificing yourself isn’t service to others, no matter how much some want to push martyrdom. Service to others is living your best life and sharing some of that with others who could use a little of the extra that you have. The extra can be time, money, talent, smiles, it doesn’t matter what it is as long as it’s given from the heart and with the best intentions. That doesn’t mean it might not include hard work, but it will always be worth it both for the giver and receiver.